my advice to married couple by eguriase s. m. okaka

MY ADVICE TO MARRIED COUPLE

BY EGURIASE S. M. OKAKA Marriage is the oldest institution on earth. It is as old as creation itself. God saw a lonely man in the Garden of Eden and decided that he would give him a companion in the person of Eve. That led to the creation of the woman for the man. God did not create man for man rather he created the woman for the man. But today, there is this evil concept called ‘gay marriage’ and all other forms of union which is not right in the sight of God. They include: homosexuality and lesbianism. Homosexuality refers to a man having canal knowledge with a fellow man; while lesbianism refers to a woman having canal knowledge with a fellow woman. If you are involved in this, please stop doing it because God does not accept such act. Same Sex Marriage (Homosexuals and Lesbianism). The word ‘Homo’ means the same. A Homosexual is a man who engages in sex with another man. A Lesbian is a woman who engages in sex with another woman. Homosexuality is a type of marriage or association between two men or two women as practiced in the western world, e.g. America, United Kingdom, Germany, and many others. The Bible made it clear that God designed sex to be engaged in only between a male and a female who are legally married. God disallow homosexual conduct because it is unnatural. It is not natural to couple male with male and female with female. “So God created man in His image, in the image of God, He created male and female.” (Genesis 1:27) “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination.” (Leviticus 18:22) “If a man lie with a man as with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination; they shall be put to death, their blood is upon them.” (Leviticus 20:13) “For this reason, God gave them up to dishonorable passions. Their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural, and the men likewise gave up natural, relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in their own persons the due penalty for their error.” (Romans 1:26-28) With the above Bible quotations, we can see that sexual sin has a judgment administer by God Himself. He who made them made He male and female created he them and said, be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth. So why do you say it is man for a man and woman for a woman? Not ‘Adam for Steve’ but ‘Adam and Eve’ as the case should be not the other way round. So sexual intercourse should be between a man and a woman, not a man and another man or a woman and another woman; that is unnatural and offensive to the Creator who created the world. Let us start doing the right thing from today. Those who are married in the right way happy are you. My candid advice goes to you. Now, there are some characters you should not take advice from, if you do you are endangering your marriage with your own hand. Let us consider the following: • Do not take advice from a divorcee, if you do, she may teach you her own way and soon you will become like her. A divorcee has already separated from her husband what advice do you expect to get from her? Definitely not a good one she will advise you to leave your husband as well so that you could be like her. At least, I am not going to be the only divorcee in the world others will joint me to make the crown of divorcees. ‘Show me your friend and I will tell you who you are.’ If a divorcee is your friend she will definitely teach you her ways. ‘Birds of the same feathers flock together’. It is true! • If you must take advice from anyone, please, look for those who have spent over 50 years in marriage. These are the ones who will tell you the bitter and sweet side of marriage. Everything is not always rosary as the case may be. Do you know that there are ups and downs in marriage? How will you wade or tackle such periods. That is why you should get such persons who have concrete experience in marriage. A divorcee would be a bad choice because she was not able to tackle such situations when it came knocking at her door, that is the reason why she is not in her marriage now. • Do not keep unmarried friends. It is dangerous to your matrimony. They are not married so they can still do what you and them use to do before you got married, but now that you are married you can leave them and be separate from them because you are now bind to a man while they are not. That was how a married woman followed one of her females to a birthday ceremony and she met a man there who lured her and have canal knowledge of this lady. Few weeks later, she discovers that she was pregnant. How did she become pregnant? That was the big question because her husband was away for the past few months. It was revealed that the pregnancy came in as a result of the canal knowledge she had with that guy during the birthday ceremony. To cut long story short, she lost her marriage because she was still flocking with her unmarried friends. • Avoid discussing your husband’s weakness with your female friends. Do not tell your friends the amount your husband is giving you for feeding. There was a situation that happened before about a lady who gossips her husband to her friend revealing the amount of money the man gives her to buy foodstuffs from the market and her friend shouted what! That is too small! She then advised her friend to leave the marriage and go out and look for a better man who will give her good money.

Her friend foolishly yielded to her and parked out of her husband’s house. As soon as her friend left the marriage she parked in and took her place as the man’s wife. That is the man she advise her friend to leave because of money but indirectly she was interested in that same money that she said was small, unknowingly to her friend that she was eyeing that amount of money. Who will you blame? Well I blamed the woman who foolishly gossips her husband with her friend. A woman once told her neighbor that her husband’s dick was very big and that it suits her very well during what her husband do to her. Surprisingly, this woman went in when her neighbor was not at home to have a taste of that dick. Who is to blame here? It is the woman who gossips her husband with her neighbor. O woman avoid discussing your husband with your friends. They will jealous you and break your marriage. Wise woman don’t discuss their husbands with their friends, it is only foolish women that does that. • Lack of Intimacy: Intimacy encompasses more than physical closeness; it embodies emotional vulnerability and genuine connection. Couples thrive when they invest time to shared intimate experience, communicate, openly about their feelings, and expresses affection. However, partners can feel isolated and neglected when this emotional bond begins to wither. A lack of intimacy can be a powerful indicator that your marriage relationship is at a crossroad. So watch against it! Intimacy is one gift that you can give to your spouse that will make him or her feel that they belongs to somebody. When there is a lack of intimacy the sweetness of a relationship is threaten. This can make your partner feel separated from you; when they feel so, that is when they start contemplating divorce. Please, watch against that in your marriage relationship. • Avoid taking your marital issues to a third party or outsider. If you must do then seek advice from those who must have been married for over fifty years and above and they are still on board the ship together. These are the ones you should take advice from not young couples like yourselves. • Avoid taking your marital issues to your parents. They are your parents so they may be bias when taking decisions and their judgment will always favor one party because whether married or not you still share that tender-tie with them so the possibility of joining one side is high. You are married now and you can solve that issue yourselves if you have understanding. There is no problem you cannot solve with understanding between both of you. It is not difficult. Just learn to understand him or her. Understand what he likes and dislikes and avoid doing it. Once both of you understand each other there would be no need inviting your parents to come and solve problems for you. There is no problem in your marriage relation that is beyond your solution. • Your wife is a vital part of you. She is not a slave therefore do not beat her. If you do you are making her a slave or one of those furniture in your house. When you start beating your wife you are isolating her from you and she might start living in fear of you. You are already developing a psychological problem in her unknown to you. That is when she will start thinking of living you or her marriage. She will be feeling that her marriage to you is bondage and she will wish to free herself from that bondage. In most cases it is the men who always cause such situations by their actions. How did you expect your wife to still love you when you always beat her? How will you still be expecting her to be loyal to you when you cheat on her? • Tell him your past life history that would make him trust you. Some ladies or males have a very terrible past but foolishly, they keep hiding such past. That is not too good because it might expose one day. There is nothing hidden under the sun that shall not be uncovered one day. Do not allow him or her hear of your past from another. Tell him yourself. Tell her yourself. If he hears it from your own mouth it is better than hearing it from another person’s mouth. I have heard of some men who still married their women after hearing their horrible past. Such men are classified as men who truly love a lady in spite of her past life he still went ahead to marry her. I know of a man whose wife told him before they got married, that I had a guy who got me pregnant during my secondary school days and denied me and the child then and travelled abroad. He came back after some years, telling the woman that he still loved her and want to claim paternity of the child. The woman agreed to give him his child but I can’t marry you now because I belong to another man now she said to him. All the blackmail issued by the former guy to her husband never yielded any result because her husband who knew of his wife’s case joined in and helped her to fight the case with the former guy until they became victorious. And he took his child and they flew abroad. Because the man knew he joined her in the battle so don’t hide your past from your man. Many marriages are no more today because they hid their past from themselves and when the secret came to the open the marriage could not stand anymore. • Don’t hate your wife! Hatred makes you a murderer according to the holy Bible. Conclusively, the man and the woman are both one flesh by marriage. They have been made one flesh no long two separate persons who came from different background but have been made a united force by marriage. “Therefore, shall a man leaves his father and mother and cleaves to his wife and they become one flesh.” So whatever you do to your wife affects you aversely and whatever she does to you affects her too, because you are now one flesh. So, if you beat her you are beating yourself. If you make her cry you are crying yourself. If you do any negative thing to her you will get negative result in return. If you do any positive thing to her you will get positive result in return. Since, you have known this let us do positive things towards one another so that we could get positive results always. That is my candid advice to marriage couples. By Eguriase S. M. Okaka